Coming Out of the Closet

No, I'm not gay, so please grow up for about a minute and a half. However, I use that expression to describe what is probably the gayest thing I do on a regular basis.
When I mean gay, I don't use it literally, of course. But every Saturday night at 11:00, I tune into Cartoon Network to watch this latest (I hesitate to say "popular") Japanimation creation known as "Inuyasha". I'd like to think that I'm about 10% nerd, so why not watch a show that fills 120 to 130% of my geeky qualities. I can't explain the plot since I don't quite know what it is yet, but it involves some dude with cat ears and overwhelmingly gorgeous hair, a girl who never changes out of her jumper, a stupid cry-baby pussy who whines like he's always talking out his LiveJournal, and one extrordinarily hot woman who serves no other purpose other than to arouse my interest, if you know what I mean (and I think you do). She drags around a giant boomerang as big as the [never mind] I get [going to change the angle of this joke]. There's also a little cutie pie character that's about two inches tall and, surprisingly, doesn't get squished every episode. I'm still searching for his or her gender and purpose as well. But surely, the possibilities are endless with a group like this!
"Inuyasha" follows all the standard Japanimation cliches (which I aquired a great knowledge of from watching multiple episodes of Pokemon) by assuming its audience is composed entirely of lobodomy patients. Characters reiterate and overstate the obvious and repeat the name of the person they are addressing to ensure that even the two-month-olds are up to speed. Since it's Japanese and it's considered to be for "adults", there is a ton of meaningless violence. This enables the characters to yell out their every attack, or else they won't work, I suppose. Don't believe me? Just the other day I was trying to grab a cookie out of the cafeteria, but I couldn't nab it unless I yelled out "super awesome cookie grab". True story.
I hope I don't sound like I'm endorsing this show because I wouldn't suggest watching it. "Inuyasha" is what I refer to as "train wreck television" in which it is so disgustingly horrible that you mustn't look but can't turn away. Jerry Springer and every other daily talk show host has perfected this, and it appears that the rest of television is following suit. My suggestion, keep it on ESPN, or gouge your eyes out. Either one.